Raising a Child in todays society

**Pulls out the Soapbox** Yes, I am going to vent about people.

I am not a Modern parent in some senses. Yes, Baby B plays with my phone when she gets ahold of it. Yes, I have apps just for her to get me 2 minutes of potty time or cooking time. The parts that I differ at though is mostly related to… everything?

First, lets define helicopter parenting; there actually is a definition n the dictionary at this point for this issue. Basically it comes down to not letting children develop their own sense of self and understand natural consequences. I don’t hover over Baby B. Yes, I watch her and talk with her and keep her out of the road and from touching the stove; things she’s not mentally ready to understand. I don’t stop her from annoying the dogs. I know that the dogs will react and trust them not to hurt her. Baby B needs to understand the limits and is best to learn them herself. I let her slide down a single stair the wrong way. How else will she understand that she isn’t ready to step down on her own or to respect elevation differences? I let her walk/crawl around dirty places. She and her clothing will wash. She needs the exposure to germs to delevelpe her immune system. She needs to build her self confidence in her ability to move and explore.

Yes, I keep her in my sites all the time. Yes, she is learning and understanding that she needs to stay with me to stay out of the cart/stroller. Yes, she is learning to make eye contact and check in with me to gauge her behavior. Yes, I let her cry in the store because I won’t give in her to demands. Yes, I get dirty looks from other parents because of letting her walk around on dirty surfaces and not stopping her from doing things.

Yes, it’s hard to fight the norm. Yes, the dirty looks hurt my parenting self esteem for a little bit. But logic wins over conformity in the end. Logically, it will hurt Baby B more than help her if I hover and stop her from ever hurting herself. Logically, she needs to develop her own sense of self and capabilities.  Logically, her life will be over her own making and will be won and lost on her confidence and not mine. Logically, I won’t always be there to help her in the rough spots.

I need to help her learn consequences and problem solving. I need to help her learn her boundaries and how to safely climb the brick walls that pop up. It will hurt her if I am the ladder over the walls. It will hurt her if the boundaries are never enforced. It will hurt her if I always smooth the rough spots in life for her. Baby B needs to learn self control and reliance and the only way to do that is to let pain happen.

I will always be the lifeguard to her swimming pool of life. I will teach her to swim. I will assist when asked and I will intervene when the sharks come. I won’t be her life vest. I dearly love this child of mine and it is out of love that I take my parenting stance.

Enjoy! **Steps off the soapbox**

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About Tara B.
Hi, I am Tara B. and its great to meet you!! I am an outgoing person with introvert tendencies. I have two amazing dogs that I love and adore! You will hear about them and their adventures a lot :D I also have the most amazing husband! Together he and I have Miss Go Go (you'll also see her referred to as Baby B) that was born in the spring of 2015. She is smart, quick learner, and loves to mimic everything she sees. I love to cook, bake, try to stay healthy, and read. I love to explore my area (and the world when life allows), and seek out fun things to do. You want more information just ask! I am horrible at writing "About You" sections...:) If you have any questions, comments, ect I can be reached at CraftsByTaraB@gmail.com.

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