Marriage and the term Team

I don’t understand why when people describe marriage or being married they use the word Team. When I think of a team I see pictures of a team of horses pulling a wagon or soccer players getting the ball down the field for a goal. A team is actually defined as: two or more people working together; typically towards a common goal. In a marriage what is the common goal?

At this junction you are probable wondering how I would describe marriage. I strongly believe that each marriage is different. Don’t believe me, go talk to your parents or grandparents about marriage. For my marriage I would say that we are counter weights and counter parts to each other. We can’t be a “team” because we don’t have a common goal; besides love for eternity. Hubby wants to work for a start up and make lots of money for retierment. I want to travel, have something to do with dogs, have 5+ acres of land, and eventually end up in Public Relations/Marketing; think I need to go back to school :(. At the same point in time he grounds me (I am a dreamer and adventure by nature) and I lift him to new things (he is methodical and grounded by nature).

I know, I know, I said that we had a common goal in love for eternity. How does one love in common though? My Grandfather sends my Grandmother flowers out of the blue, and in return she lets him fish all he wants without complaint. Hubby’s Grandmother and Grandfather had the same type of marriage. My Hubby kisses hello and goodbye and goes shopping with me; without to much complaining. I don’t shop in a straight line. This means that a simple grocery store trip has me traversing the store 5 times to get all the items. In return I take care of the little things in the house so he doesn’t have to. I cook, clean, ect, so he has more time to spend on the other things, installing new light fixtures and switches, that need to get done around the house, and enjoy his time consuming hobbies. It takes hours to get a rusty piston to move, let alone a rusted and stripped out bolt. Even in my own house the definitions are different.

Hubby describes us a team with the common long term goal of perfect house and raising kids. I don’t  agree with these because 1) there is no “perfect house” only a house that we have agreed on, aka nicely compromised house, and 2) kids are not a guarantee in life. Yes, we both want kids in  a few years but, there are no guarantees in life. This doesn’t come between us thou, and it doesn’t change our love for each other. See love is our common goal.

There are times in marriage and life you do need to be a team. I also agree with my Hubby that raising kids is a team effort! You both need to be on the same page and back each other up so you can raise a great adult. You need to be a team sometimes when I comes to your families. You can’t give difference responses to the same family for the same question (i.e What are your Christmas plans?).

I don’t expect you to agree with my outlook on this subject; my Hubby doesn’t. If you do use the term Team to describe your marriage and are willing to share why, please do!



About Tara B.
Hi, I am Tara B. and its great to meet you!! I am an outgoing person with introvert tendencies. I have two amazing dogs that I love and adore! You will hear about them and their adventures a lot :D I also have the most amazing husband! Together he and I have Miss Go Go (you'll also see her referred to as Baby B) that was born in the spring of 2015. She is smart, quick learner, and loves to mimic everything she sees. I love to cook, bake, try to stay healthy, and read. I love to explore my area (and the world when life allows), and seek out fun things to do. You want more information just ask! I am horrible at writing "About You" sections...:) If you have any questions, comments, ect I can be reached at

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